a time for letting go of destructive habits.... as I sat last night in Sacred Space, I pondered how I could let go of this anger, frustration and doubting my search.... and this came to me:
the doubt and questioning of my spiritual journey and beliefs is actually my ego sabotaging me and putting the doubts and fears there... it is important for me to cleanse & rid myself of these negative feelings and thoughts or else, i won't move forward through it. Look upon it as a test, a challenge. Continue to meditate, journal and spend time with your wise women friends. Even if it becomes tiresome and difficult and you begin to doubt yourself.. KEEP GOING !! When you feel or see these thoughts coming, stop and turn them away - journal them away... you are away of them now and it will be easier.
so today, I will sit with a cup of tea and do a letting go ritual..
a few months ago, I did a workshop called 'Paint your canvas' - I went along not really knowing what to expect. Not having done art in my life, I was a little nervous... but the teacher was wonderful. We meditated, we chanted and we played... and over the weeks, a painting emerged on my canvas. I would dream of it and was instructed on what to do as i dreamed.. to put netting on her cloak, to make her dress a vibrant red, to use an old button as a clasp.... I had seen this woman, many, many times but could not get her out in anyway. It is a painting of myself or my Guardian in a past life...... Yesterday at our wise woman gathering, I saw her in meditation.. sitting quietly... gathering mistletoe berries.... she is guiding me to peacefullness..
After this painting was done, was the time my yearning for connection, my desire to visit Cornwall started to diminish.......
Once a fortnight, I go to a gathering of women, there are only five of us and we work through Women who run with the Wolves.. yesterday we made a dream catcher and once it is cleansed and smudged, I am going to hang it on my door at Beltane. I used ivy & string and spun a web while we chatted about our journeys. I weaved shells and sticks that I had gathered and a feather that I found once while walking. I think gatherings like this are truly missed by women of our time.. once upon a time we sat around fires in circles, sharing our knowledge... I am blessed that this circle has come to me at this time. I have yearned for it for so long.
10 comments:
Hi Robyn,
that sounds great and I love your work of art. That is very beautiful. I know what you mean about the constant doubt. This entry has helped me a lot !!!!
Have a great day and a great beginning of the new waxing moon.
greetings from The Netherlands
So have I yearned for a circle of women. I was part of one through my studies in natural health 15 years ago. It was more a classroom setting, but we sat on the floor and chanted and one lesson was all about the medicine wheel. A wonderful school. Good classes. I miss it. I would like to find a circle of wise women.
One day....
I took the liberty of drawing a card from the deck "gentle wisdom of the faerie realms" for you, as I thought about your painting.
Actually 2 cards fell out. The first one was Freedom. The second Confidence.
Happy New Moon to you.
It sounds strange that you are celebrating Beltane - a spring ritual. We are in fall and soon will be celebrating Samhain. Do you also celebrate Samhain? Or Halloween?
Love & Light
Moon moon moon moon.... I am not happy with her at the moment. I cannot control my destructive urges to snap and bite (verbally). I have begged and pleaded but she is trying to teach me a lesson I think. I will put an offering out and try to calm myself down. You should see the dastardly look on my face that just won't budge. Big sigh! xox
I won't talk about myself next time, promise.
What a gorgeous painting!
I too have found a group. Mostly women but there are a couple of pagan men who come to our monthly meets.
Young and old, new and experienced, and I am learning enjoyable things.
But to have a woman only group would be even better.
ou sound happeir than youve done for ages! good for you! I do like that pic.
How wonderful to be in a women's group. My copy of Wolves got read the first 5 chapters read, then ended up in the boot of the car where it got wet and ruined! So I guess that says something about my motivation to finish reading it!
hugs x
Your painting is lovely, Robyn!
Robyn?! That painting is EXQUISITE! I just love it. I think she is gorgeous and the magick just emanates from the page. I am glad that magick is finding you and that you have such a special place to create art with good people.
Sound like your art group and your wise woman group sounds very spiritual and soothing.
So glad to read you are letting go of your destructive habits. A little confession "It real upsets me if I catch my self coming back to destructive habit"
Coffee is on.
It is lovely that you have found a place within a circle of women.
That was what I missed most from my workmates in Junee when I left there. We may not always have been wise women but we had each other. You are talking about a sense of community between people of similar interests. That is important.
I see your painting is mystical I like it.
I s'pose I am celebrating Beltane with my joy of the plants around me in my own funny way.
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