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"She seemed to come suddenly upon happiness as if she had surprised a butterfly in the Winter woods"
(edith wharton)


Sunday 11 November 2007

my croning~goddess ritual

well, I did it! early Saturday morning i gathered together all the rocks and items of nature, the wise words and cards from my lovelies all over the world.... I packed them into a basket along with the candle that Judie sent me and some incense that Blue sent me... matches, a white tablecloth, my reading glasses and camera... and I drove to Katoomba Falls lookout, stopping on the way to buy myself a coffee and pain au chocolat... a girl has to have sustenance!... the rain stopped as I got out of the car and as I walked to the 'cave' I felt at one with Mother Earth.. the air is fresh in Katoomba, no smog or pollution.. pure and earthy after rain... I drank in the wetness of the trees and noticed the O'Yarrarng growing everywhere.. the sacred herb used by Aboriginals to smudge.... I arrived at the shelter and proceeded to take a photo as I set up... first of the 'cave'

sorry about the fuzziness of the photo, it was misty..

and then the batteries went flat.... ok Universe, I get the message... a solitary ritual is just that... not shared with anyone.. a sign that this was truly meant to be a solitary venture....I then saw that someone had 'grafittied' on the wall the words: 'Our Lady of Guadalupe'.... that is all that was written. So I began.... I set up my altar.. laying the white tablecloth, lighting the candle and incense and setting all the gorgeous nature items out along with the words..... and I settled myself on the comfy cushion. I realized then, that I had forgotten to pack my journal and a pen... great.. I had to remember anything that came to mind instead of writing it down as it came to me. And I started reading... and gasping, and realizing, and crying and feeling at one with each of you who were lighting candles and thinking of me at that very moment... I felt Daisy there, whispering to me to let all the self-help books go for the time being and to settle into this goddess time of mine... the time for the books will come but I need to just be with myself and to absorb all these wise words... and as I read.. a man ran past and startled me....he just said 'sorry' and went on.... so I let go of my embarassment that i had been feeling earlier... it is ok to be me.. no-one is thinking anything of my 'ways'..this lovely message came to my mind. And I read further, feeling so loved and cared for and each word made sense to me... each and every word helped me ~ alot ... then a woman walked past and gasped ~ "what are you doing? You look like you are very spiritual"... and I explained about my birthday coming up, and about Daisy and about all my lovely friends and how they had written some words of wisdom for me to read on this my croning ceremony. I told her about my search through life ~ she told me that we all search, it is what we are meant to do and that we are all connected... and I asked her how old she was... 54 she told me... and we looked at each other with a knowing.....then she told me that she had sold her home in London and had bought an old house in the wilds of Scotland. She had retired from a high powered job, due to ill health and was now travelling the sacred areas of the world.. I told her of my ancestors in Cornwall and how I wanted to visit and I told her of my connection to Wales and Scotland and she told me that Scotland is a very special place and asked me if I had a pen as she would love me to visit her if I ever get to Scotland... of course, I didn't. And her words:'well, it wasn't meant to be'..... she wished me luck with my journey and as she walked away, I noticed her deep azure blue eyes, the pupils ringed with gold...... she was an angel. I am sure of it.

so I continued reading and tears streamed down my face...... until I finally finished reading, knowing that I must take them again, to Juliets Balcony, when it is sunny & dry and read them all again.... I packed up my things.. wishing I could take a photo of the mist in the gully and putting my camera away, I thought i would try it again.. and it worked... but you know... I didn't take a photo because it just didn't feel right.....as I walked back to the car, I picked a small piece of o'yarrarng to take home for my altar...and the first car that drove past me had the number plates :ANG 111. the angels were with me! then it started to pour with rain.

so now I am in-utero as a crone, absorbing all the wisdom that has been given to me.... awaiting my birth on January 1st 2008.... to burst forth into my Goddess years... and this tale is my contribution to Sacred Sunday....


Australians will pause for a minute's silence at 11am today to remember the sacrifice of Australian soldiers who died fighting for the nation.
At the 11th hour on the 11th day on the 11th month Australia, and other countries around the world, will mark the anniversary of the armistice, which ended The Great War in 1918.

33 comments:

Anonymous said...

Robyn,you are such a delight.You know I very much relate to "the search" as the spokes of a wheel, while our true being is the wheel's centre (a Taoist thing I guess, and something I find beautifully calming in the inner stillness of Taoist Tai Chi).I am only just catching up with your previous posts.I am very much like you,was thrilled to find your blog, and am so pleased that you are the way you are.

Annie Z said...

What a magical time!
A
xxx

amelia said...

It sounds wonderful and magical, may you find peace now...

Sheila said...

I found this post so emotional Robyn, everything sounds perfect, even if the weather and the camera did not co-operate.
Remembrance Day is the 11th here too, to answer your question. I posted early that's all. I have a lot to do tomorrow.
Congratulations on becoming a crone in waiting. Everything is in place for January 1st..!
hugs
xo

Tracy said...

Robyn, thank you for sharing the magic of your solitary celebration!

Bimbimbie said...

Robyn, I felt both shivers and goosebumps reading the words of your encounter with the lady from Scotland ... she gave you a wonderful start to the rest of your journey Smiles *!*

Anonymous said...

How wonderful to have so many auspicious signs and encounters along your way, with angels watching over you every step of the way! Love and hugs to you, Robyn~xOxOxOx

gma said...

The candle I lit for you flickered many times yesterday.My thoughts were with you each time that I looked at the flame. You did have angels with you. Wishing you many lovely blessings.

Peggy said...

What a perfect day! What wonderful adventures await you!

Julie said...

Robyn,

Your description of your croning ceremony was so real that I felt I was there too. Now I can visualize the "cave", so I, for one, am glad you got one photo in.

I felt chills along my spine as you realized you saw an angel. I truly believe some people have seen angels. As a newspaper reporter I interviewed people who saw - or felt - angels on earth, and you did too.

I understand about not wanting to share private crone wisdom. I was under the impression that people were going to send you croning words that they copied, but like me, they must have felt it was too impersonal.

Never, ever again doubt that you are loved by people FROM AROUND THE WORLD. They surrounded you with love yesterday, and every day.

Love,

Julie

Patty said...

Aww what a special day you had. I am glad things turned out so perfect.

Leanne said...

Robyn, simply,it was as it was meant to be.
with love, Leanne x

Rowan said...

The cave at Katoomba Falls looks and sounds like the perfect place for your croning ceremony. In the end it all worked out beautifully - even the rain stopped for you:) I think Daisy gave you good advice - it's time for you to just be.......

Claire said...

i was wondering how your ceremony had gone, dear robyn...
thank you for sharing your most sacred moments with us - we're all so blessed you did :o)

kathyann said...

Robyn ,I am a great believer in fate and things happening for a reason, we may not be able to see it at the time but if its meant to be ,its meant to be ! peace and happiness from Kathyann

Annie Jeffries said...

Dearest Robyn,

Your tale of your ceremony was so deeply moving. All the moments that lead to the angel encounter, the 111, the "lack" of pen and paper. The cave was amazing and so unexpected. You must have felt so warm and cocooned in there. Such a wonderful and symbolic birthing place.

My candel flickered for you all afternoon dear Robyn. I asked Mary, my beloved mother to embrace you and hold you as her special searching daughter. Her arms are your home. The words graffitied on the cave of Our Lady of Guadalupe is a sign that she was there with you.

I can't say enough how much this account and your efforts have moved me. Many blessings and a safe, continuing journey.

AnnieELF

Fire Byrd said...

I'm sorry hon to have missed sending you some words for your special day. But i hope you know by now how important you are to me.

Sounds a wonderful experience, especially the angel visit.
pxx

Moonroot said...

What an amazing experience. Thank you so much for sharing it with us - I feel very honoured to read this account. Blessed be.
And, you asked for my email address - moonroot@uko2.co.uk

peppylady (Dora) said...

Glad your spiritual journey was a blessing.
Recently I feel like I feel off the spiritual quest wagon or being a whirl wind of spiritual lost.

J C said...

Robyn that was an AMAZING story. You didn't even need pictures. Thank you for doing this, thank you for sharing your life, your thoughts, your feelings. I know that you have a good heart. I can feel it.

Anonymous said...

Robyn, thank you for sharing your most sacred ceremony honoring your Self! I'm in awe, shivers and tears. Bless you.

Anonymous said...

Robyn I loved your story of your ceremony. So glad I could be a small part of it. Love Hugs and Blessings

Suzie Ridler said...

Oh Robyn, how amazing! I love how you did this, why you did this ritual and what came of it for you. I think most of all you realized you are not alone in any way and that there are spiritual beings out there with you.

I didn't send him the cookies, it wasn't possible because he's on the vessel all the time BTW. Just shared them with friends!

storyteller said...

I'm grateful to Carla for referencing your "croning-goddess ritual" and feel blessed to read this amazing account today. Thank you for sharing your intention, process, and experiences so vividly ... setting an example for women everywhere.
Hugs and blessings,

DAWN said...

That was intense. I felt a little like a voyer peering in on you at your most vulerable. Thank you for sharing bits and pieces with us. I am like you and think that woman was an angel. That was a sublime example of living in the moment.
Namaste,
Dawn

Anonymous said...

That is so special. It looks like a very beautiful place.
Do you know a lot about the Aboriginal spirituality ????
I'm sure Daisy was there with you. I didn't know her in her lifetime, but I discovered her weblog after her passing. She was a very special person and you were very lucky to have known her. It's only natural that after such a friendschip, she's always close to you now.
I wish I had such a friend but maybe that is something that lies in the future !!
Have a great day !!

couragetocreatewriteandlove said...

Everyone love the way you are!
Stay this wild beautiful sage way!
xx

Everydaythings said...

A magical post Robyn that youve shared. I can imagine how peaceful and still the bush place you chose must be, just the perfect place for such a special ceremony. Are you feeling any different post ritual?

Ruth said...

This sounds a very special ceremony Robyn - and I love the honest mixture of the spiritual with everyday ordinary human anxiety. That is what makes you real and genuine and makes your blog such fun to read.

mrsnesbitt said...

So very honest and totally absorbing.

Dxx

Anonymous said...

Wow. What an incredible croning you had! I bought a new candle for you and I've been including you in my Goddess blessings and prayers, since you told me/us about your upcoming croning ceremony.

I too had shivers and goosebumps of delight when reading about your experience and the ways in which She reached out to you. It was simply Divine!

Thank you for posting about the Australian minute of silence.

Big LoVe and Hugs to you! Welcome to croning fully and fulfillingly.

A bird in the hand said...

I read every word and I am so moved...there's nothing I can say except thank you for sharing your experiences. xoxoxo

laoi gaul~williams said...

Robyn that was so special and thank you so much for sharing with us all.